Lately, I’ve been working on something that’s both personal and professional: changing my mindset from negative to positive. This is not easy, and I’m not perfect at all. I’m only in the awareness stage, and I’ve found the process frustrating.. daunting. I find it insane how often I’m negative and make statements that reflect the mindset.
Today, I’m writing this post to mark the beginning of my journey to change, and I plan to share monthly updates to track my progress and hopefully help others who might be on a similar path.
Step 1: Awareness
The first step in any change is recognizing the issue. From step 1 in alcoholics anonymous, to my journey here. Now, awareness is a journey of its own. You need to recognize the issue and then understand it. You need to realize when the issue is occurring and then understand why and how. While this seems simple enough, when something is hardwired in your brain… it feels natural, and you will struggle to see a problem, or THE problem.
I’ve enlisted a buddy to help me spot my negative actions, and here is the first thing I’ve noticed and become aware of. I don’t know when I am being negative. Period.
I’ve found that when something is difficult to recognize, it can be helpful to find patterns around what you are looking for. Patterns can be established that act like a homing beacon to a situation, and a lot of times those patterns can be the cause.
We’ve noticed my pattern: I tend to slip into negativity when I’m trying to be funny or break tension in a conversation. Humor is a coping mechanism, but sometimes it leans too far into sarcasm or pessimism. Now, I’m learning to pause and ask myself, “Is this helping or hurting the tone?”
Awareness is key to a change. You can’t change something you aren’t aware of or know of its existence. In this regard, the change has already started.
Step 2: Journaling
I’ve started journaling daily using a positivity-focused journal with prompts designed to shift my mindset. The idea is to first document my thoughts, focusing on mindset and events. I can then review the entries to try and find triggers and changes, also to reflect on the journey I’ve been through and will continue.
First and foremost, journaling increases self-awareness. Again, looking for triggers and pressure points, then self-reflecting on how to deal or remove these situations in the future. Today, I will write about a situation with my business partner where she was incredible unhappy with my responses to questions… somewhat accusational about me trying to be funny in a serious situation. It wasn’t welcome, however previous revelations show that I have a tendency to do this, and also defending the response is unnecessary. In this situation, positivity wasn’t working, but negativity is just annoying, so perhaps silence is best… and you know what, it worked.
Journaling is going to help in the long-run with Step 4: Practicing Reframing. Reflecting on the events, we can ask “how can I do this differently?” and from there, grow. Growth is a very important cornerstone of positivity, and a “growth mindset” is incredibly important in life. Reference “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success” by Carol S. Dweck.
I think the most important reason for journaling is a documented trail of success. I will be able to look back at the journey and think, “I did that, I changed that, look where I’ve been and where I’m going.” This feeling of success keeps humans moving, and changes outlooks of feeling stuck or in a rut into feelings of I’ve got this, I’ve been there, I’m on my way.
A first self-reflection here: I tried journaling at night, but I struggled to keep the habit—so I’ve moved journaling to the morning. We’ll see if this is a better fit for my routine and helps set a positive tone for the day.
Step 3: Blogging
Here we are. Why am I writing this post?
This blog is part of my accountability. The goal is to post once a month to reflect on what’s working, what’s not, and how I’m growing. Writing publicly adds a layer of commitment and gives me a space to share insights and struggles.
The benefit for you? You will see in real time what I’m going through, doing, struggling, and succeeding with.
This is a public journal of sorts. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll find it helpful as well.
Here are the things I’m working toward in the future.
Step 4: Practicing Reframing
Reframing is a powerful tool. Instead of saying, “This is overwhelming,” I’m learning to say, “This is challenging and exciting.” It’s a subtle shift, but it changes how I approach problems and opportunities.
Step 5: Three Good Things
I’m experimenting with listing three good things that happened each day. Since I journal in the morning, this can be tricky—but growth means finding what works. Maybe I’ll revisit nighttime journaling later, or find another way to reflect on the day’s positives.
Step 6: Surrounding Myself with Positivity
This one’s tough. Positivity is contagious, but so is negativity—and right now, my office leans toward the latter. I’m curious: is this common in IT environments? If so, how do we shift the culture? I don’t have answers yet, but I’m asking the questions.
Step 7: Setting Forward-Thinking Goals
I’ve set two achievable goals:
- Journal every day.
- Make my workouts every day.
These are small but meaningful steps toward building consistency and self-discipline.
Step 8: Practicing Mindfulness and Gratitude
I haven’t started this yet, but here’s the plan:
- Note things I’m grateful for in my journal.
- Explore mindfulness apps—maybe Apple Fitness has something useful.
- Try focused breathing exercises to stay present and reduce stress.
Step 9: Limiting Negative Inputs
This is a big one. Social media, news, even certain conversations can drag me down. I’m working on setting boundaries and being intentional about what I consume. It’s hard in today’s world, but necessary.
Final Thoughts
This journey isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. I’m learning, adjusting, and staying open to change. If you’re working on your mindset too, I’d love to hear what’s helping you. Let’s grow together.